


Ugly Sweater Competition

by PlutoApologist



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: F/F, M/M, Murphy Siblings Bonding, Warning: Ugly Sweaters, pure fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 01:56:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13225752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PlutoApologist/pseuds/PlutoApologist
Summary: Connor and Evan have a competition with Zoe and Alana over which couple looks cuter in ugly sweaters.





	Ugly Sweater Competition

Connor told himself that the only reason he was throwing rocks at the window of Evan’s dorm room was because he wasn’t answering his texts. After all, it was an emergency. 

It did help that it fulfilled his fantasy of being the leading man in a romantic comedy film, that he had watched with Zoe, under threat of his nail polish being stolen, and begrudgingly enjoyed. He had let that fact slip to Evan when they had started dating and he had been teased about it to no end. 

He pulled his thin jacket around him and dug his hands deeper in his pockets, as another cold gust of wind assaulted him. He was starting to regret doing this in the middle of December. Maybe there was a reason most of the reasons cliché rom coms happen in summer. 

The window opened, and Jared popped his head out of the window, sporting an old sweatshirt and messy hair, completely ruining his fantasy. 

“Some of us are actually trying to work, not be cliché, asshole,” Jared griped loudly. “Your boyfriend’s not here. He’s getting lunch.”

Connor’s only response was to shoot him the middle finger. He resisted the urge to pull his coat tighter around himself and glared up at the window, trying his best to appear unaffected by the cold, despite his shivering. Jared just rolled his eyes.

“Jesus, he’ll be back soon. I’ll let you in at the front door. You know I can’t stand to see my fellow man suffer. Gimme a sec.” Jared disappeared and popped his head back out of the window. “This better be an emergency, Murphy.”

True to his word, Jared appeared at the front door of the dorm soon. Connor slowly walked to the door, smirking at Jared’s shivering frame. If Jared had let him suffer outside for five minutes when he didn’t have to, he deserved to feel as cold as he had momentarily. 

“Y’know, that was cliché Murphy, but I have to hand it to you for making a straight trope gay,” Jared quipped, as they made their way up to room. He opened the door and let Connor in with a grand sweeping gesture. Connor ignored his grand sweeping gesture and immediately plopped on Evan’s bed.

“So, what was the big emergency?” Jared asked casually, despite how he had suddenly taken to kneading the blankets on his bed and tapping his foot. “Trouble in the Murphy clan? Trouble brewing between you and Evan?”

“No, nothing like that. You’re just going to hear it when Evan comes in. Anyway, aren’t some people working right now?” Connor said, raising an eyebrow and glancing to Jared’s computer. 

“Okay, I was but, hear me out. I was taking a break and looking through random Wikipedia articles and I just found out the most fascinating thing about the Cats…” Connor started zoning out as Jared continued ranting about his love for Cats. Connor’s eye glimmered mischievously and he started doing his best to annoy Jared, singing the national anthem as loud he could, trying to be louder than Jared. Finally, Jared stopped with a sigh.

“Okay, I’ll stop if you tell me what emergency you have that stopped me from working on- “Connor opened his mouth to correct him and Jared quickly corrected himself. “Procrastinating on working on papers?”

“Fine, I’ll tell you. Just you have to let me tell Evan myself,” Connor relented. Jared eagerly nodded his agreement and leaned forward, bouncing up and down. “Zoe and Alana think they’ll look cuter in ugly Christmas sweaters than me and Evan. I cannot let that happen. We’ve been together for eight months and they’ve only been together for five months. We have to win.”

“I can’t believe- “

Jared’s reply was cut off by the squeaky door opening. Evan entered, his cheeks red from the cold and Hufflepuff scarf still wrapped tightly around his neck. Connor’s felt his cheeks heating up and rushed over to greet Evan with a hug, pecking his cheek as he drew away. 

“Connor?! You didn’t say you were coming over! I- um- what’s going on?”

“I need you to look ugly.” Evan stopped in the middle of unwrapping his Hufflepuff scarf from his neck. 

“Excuse me?”

Connor mouthed ‘shut it’ to Jared who was sarcastically grinning and making a thumbs up gesture at him. Evan looked between them confused. Connor calmed himself by slipping his hand into Evan’s.

“Let me rephrase that. Zoe and Alana think they would look cuter than us in ugly Christmas sweaters, which is absolutely untrue, and I need you to look cute in the ugliest Christmas sweater possible.”

“Okay, but why couldn’t you just text me instead of surprising me? Not that I don’t appreciate any chance I get to see you,” Evan said, squeezing Connor’s hand reassuringly and looking up at him doe-eyed.

“I did, actually, and it was just- um,” Connor stuttered out. Evan looking up at him like he hung the moon on a string always made him lose track of what he was saying. Zoe had been amazed the first time she saw Connor, who normally always had something to say about everything, be silenced by one sweet look from Evan. “It was an emergency!”

“It was an emergency?” Evan asked, the corners of his mouth tilting into a smile. “Christmas isn’t for two weeks.” Evan couldn’t help but get grin at the rare circumstances of Connor getting excited over something. Connor was still sensitive though, so he tried to keep his joy at Connor’s awkwardness at a minimum. 

“Yeah, but we have to do research and find the ugliest ones,” Connor stated like it was obvious, letting go of Evan’s hand and leaning against the wall casually, crossing his arms. He narrowed his eyes challengingly. “I’m serious about winning this. Are you?” 

Connor raised his eyebrows and bit his lip, looking into Evan’s eyes. Evan met his glance, eyes bright, and took his scarf off, putting it right back on Connor. 

“Of course. There’s no way I’m going to lose with someone as cute as you.” Evan pecked Connor’s lips and Connor stopped trying to be more composed than he was at the moment, cupping Evan’s chin lovingly and moving in for a deeper kiss. Their lips met, and it wasn’t like fireworks, like it had been at the beginning of their relationship, but a burst of sunshine after days of rain. 

Jared muttered something under his breath about how gay they were and left the room. Connor pulled back and took Evan’s hand, squeezing it tight. 

“Now, let’s find the ugliest Christmas sweaters and win this thing.”

“I really dig this- It’s great, I promise- But, um, you remember I’m Jewish, right? Again, I really don’t want to put a damper on your excitement-”

“So, a Hanukkah sweater then. All that matters is that you stay cute and the sweater is really fucking ugly.”

“Well, I was thinking of getting a nose job…”

Connor punched him lightly in the arm, suppressing a smile. Evan got his laptop and stretched out on his bed. Connor’s lanky body barely fit the crappy beds provided by the school, but he lay down and relaxed into Evan, putting an arm around his shoulders. They fit together perfectly, like two Russian nesting dolls. They spent hours online finding the ugliest Christmas and Hanukkah sweaters, alternating between laughing so hard they could feel the other person’s body shake and cringing. 

Connor sent a selfie to Zoe of him and Evan making serious faces, captioned ‘game on’. The moment after he took a picture, Evan dissolved into giggles. Connor just smiled fondly at his luck at being able to recover enough to be worthy of the glorious, imperfectly perfect, anxious man that was Evan Hansen. 

After much deliberation, they settled on two perfect sweaters. Once they got to actually buying them, Evan rubbed his fingernail against his thumb absentmindedly, looking anxiously at Connor. 

“You’re sure it’s perfect?”

“It’s not perfect, but you’re perfect, so it balances out,” Connor murmured softly into his ear. Evan raised his eyebrows and raised a finger, ready to refute him. Connor challengingly raised his eyebrows back. “I will fight you on this. Do you want me to take out my list?”

Evan meekly snuggled into Connor’s bony shoulder. 

“I don’t have a list for you. Now I feel bad,” Evan said into Connor’s shoulder.

“Mmm, why don’t you start one now.”

“Um, You let me talk about nature for as long as I like. Let’s see, you’re brave. You’re strong enough to- “ 

“Okay, let’s not go overboard,” Connor mumbled, growing red. 

The door creaking open alerted them to Jared’s presence.

“Oh my god, that is a such a fucking ugly sweater. They shouldn’t be allowed to sell that,” Jared said, awestruck. “How did you find it? “

“Ever heard of Google, dumbass?” Connor flatly replied. Evan hit his shoulder lightly, but a smile pulled at his lips. Jared snorted and perked up when Evan changed the tab to the chosen ugly Hanukkah sweater. 

“Oh my god, that one just makes me want to die.” Jared was somehow still astounded that they had managed to find a sweater that hideous.

“Perfect. Buy it, Evan,” Connor said, steepling his fingers. He could practically taste their victory.

Connor stopped Evan from typing his credit card info when they got to the payment section. Evan gave him a doe-eyed look, but Connor didn’t give in and fixed him with a serious expression. 

“You paid for our anniversary dinner. I owe you!”

“Please, this is nothing. My dad spent one hundred fifty dollars on baseball cards. Besides, he’d be glad I’m not spending birthday money on emo shit, as Larry likes to call my nail polish and earrings.” Evan just bit his lip and looked at the floor. Connor’s eye sparked mischievously as he thought of an idea.

“Come on, just give me this one thing sequoia,” Connor simpered, snaking his arm onto Evan’s shoulder. 

“How dare- We agreed never to say that nickname again,” Evan groaned through his hands that he was now using to hide his face. Connor took the computer and started entering credit card info in his moment of distraction. Evan looked through his hands after a few moments of regret and pointed an accusing finger at Connor. “You cheated!”

Connor just shrugged with an amused smile and continued to type. He leaned back, sending a winning smile toward Evan who was sulking on Jared’s bed in retaliation, red as a tomato, and laced his fingers behind his head. Connor considered it a small victory in his day every time he could make Evan blush. When his therapist had told him to try to find joy in small things, he hadn’t truly believed him, at least until he had met Evan. 

Connor’s train of thought was derailed by a buzzing from his phone. Zoe and Alana had sent back a selfie of their faces pressed together, expression deadly serious, captioned ‘prepare to lose’. Yeah, sure. He had basically just clinched him and Evan winning. 

Christmas arrived soon, along with copious amounts of Christmas music, in Evan’s opinion. The party was in full swing by the time Jared, Connor and Evan had pulled up to the Murphy’s house in Jared’s bulky minivan. Music was faintly coming from the house and the hustle and bustle of the crowded house was evident from the heavily decorated window to any onlooker. Jared just rolled his eyes and honked his horn several times when Connor jokingly told him to park a few blocks away to hide the embarrassment that was his minivan. They were all wearing the ugly holiday sweaters that had been so carefully picked and kept in mint condition (except for Jared’s, which had already been well loved). Jared didn’t want to be the only one of their friend group not wearing an ugly sweater and had gotten his own two days after Connor and Evan had bought theirs.

Jared took a moment to admire his sweater in the reflection in the window. He was wearing a sweater that had the words ‘challah’ boldly across the front and a Jewish man with long beard, a bowler hat, and toothy smile raising his hands up in celebration. 

(Jared’s sweater https://www.amazon.com/Tipsy-Elves-Challah-Hanukkah-Sweater/dp/B011MLCUZ8)

“Ready to kick ass?” Connor asked, taking Evan’s gloved hand in his. 

“Ready.”

Connor almost fell on a patch of ice getting out of the car, but recovered. He shot Evan a dangerous look and leaned down, softening once he saw Evan giggling, covering his hand with his mouth. Connor just shook his head, suppressing a soft smile and held out his hand. After all, they still did have a competition to win. 

“Get out here, you idiot. Be careful of the ice.”

“Oh really? There’s ice? I didn’t notice,” Evan said, managing to sound perfectly innocent, like he hadn’t been laughing at Connor a few seconds ago. Connor punched him lightly on the shoulder once he wasn’t on the ice. They managed to make it to the front door without any more scares.

The rush of warmth from inside was a welcome change from the bitter cold that bit at their cheeks. Everyone was enveloped by hugs from parents and friends the moment they entered the house. Evan didn’t love unexpected physical contact, but had become used to it from frequent visits to the Murphy household. 

Cynthia drew back from the enthusiastic hug and led Connor and Evan away from the door. Jared had managed to flee to the desert table, away from Cynthia’s aggressively loving hugs. Her eyebrows raised higher than should be possible when she saw their questionable fashion choices, but she recovered quickly. 

“Merry Christmas… oh and Happy Hanukkah, Evan! It’s lovely to see you two! Your sweaters are very… interesting,” Cynthia chirped, the unspoken question of why evident in her voice. 

Connor had chosen a red sweater with a background that looked like bricks, with a wreath attached to it that had a variety of colorful Christmas ornaments. To top it off, there was a plush reindeer head sticking out of the middle of the wreath. Evan was sporting a light blue sweater with smalls Stars of David scattered on it and a cool holiday season reindeer, donning sunglasses, a scarf that popped out of the sweater, a red nose that lit up and a menorah on it’s antlers. In comparison to Cynthia’s classy sweater and black pants, they looked like they had come from another planet.  
(Connor’s sweater https://happyholidaysblog.com/wp-content/uploads/Ugly-Christmas-Sweater-21.jpg)  
( Evan’s sweater https://www.charlotterusse.com/light-up-reindeer-nose-menorah-sweater/302469942.html?cid=ps:nonbrand:Google&product_id=302469942&adpos=1o1&creative=227249418654&device=c&matchtype=&network=s&mrkgcl=776&mrkgadid=2968426565&rkg_id=h-a5ffdf441578867d084dee2d8f568304_t-1514681594&gclid=CjwKCAiAj53SBRBcEiwAT-3A2GjKiggwIeMctUqvh0mJStsa6IqgY3vWsBlTmNTH5iMnQ3DTjtdEthoCJWIQAvD_BwE)  
Connor gave her a dry look. 

“It’s called fashion, mom, look it up,” Connor stated sarcastically, putting his hand on his hip, nudging Evan as indication for him to strike a pose too. Evan shyly obliged.

Cynthia out her hands up defensively.

“I didn’t say anything.”

“You didn’t have to, Mrs. Murphy,” Evan said quickly, before Connor could embarrass them further. “Have you seen Zoe and Alana?”

“You know you can call me Cynthia, honey,” Cynthia insistently pushed. Evan made an apologetic expression. Despite dating for eight months and many visits to the house, he still never thought he’d be comfortable calling Connor’s mom by her first name. 

“Mom- “

“The last time I saw them, they were talking to Heidi.” Cynthia pointed them in the direction of Heidi and the young couple and busied herself with greeting another guest. 

Alana was deep into explaining the importance of behind the scenes roles, especially stage managers, in theater to Heidi, Jared and Zoe, her eyes lighting up. Evan had to dodge the wine that was sloshing wildly in her cup, some of it flying out of her cup, as she gestured energetically. 

Zoe put her arm around her and rubbed her waist calmingly. Alana relaxed into her touch and stopped gesturing so wildly. Zoe looked at Connor and Evan and raised an eyebrow, her eyes steely with the light of competition.

“You really thought you would win with that effort?” Zoe asked, a competitive smile playing at her lips.

“Oh honey, they’re trying their best. Don’t give them a hard time,” Alana said, playing with Zoe’s hair and pressing a kiss to her forehead. Connor rolled his eyes. If they were going to ham it up and flaunt their relationship to win, he could do the same. 

Connor took Evan’s hand and idly swung their joined hands together. Evan caught on to his intentions and took a step closer, resting his head on Connor’s shoulder. 

“Okay, what’s going on here?” Heidi asked.

Connor and Zoe started speaking at the same time, but both were silenced and looked guiltily down at the ground.

“Me and Zoe think that we can look cuter in ugly sweaters than Connor and Evan,” Alana primly answered. 

“I’d love to stay to judge, but I’m gay as the 4th of July, so I can’t judge,” Jared cut in, starting to nervously play with his drink. Zoe’s eyes sparkled mischievously, and she started to speak but Jared interrupted her before she could get more than one-word in. “And we don’t need to bring up what happened on the 4th of July. Anyways, you losers can keep going with your stupid contest, but I’m going to go chat up that cutie by the fireplace.” Jared eyed the man flirtatiously and sauntered over, leaving the two couples and Heidi by themselves.

“She’s biased,” Zoe complained. Alana shushed her and Connor sent her a dirty look. 

“I’m able to be unbiased,” Heidi reprimanded, her voice sharp but her eyes gentle. “Now, be quiet and give me time to judge.”

Heidi took stock of the all of the horrendous sweaters and flushed couples before her. Zoe had a red sweater with large snowflakes scattered on it. In the center of her sweater was a reindeer with a red nose and sunglasses in a blue hoodie. Surrounding the reindeer was the words, she doesn’t even go here. Alana was wearing a sweater made too look like the wrapping of a Christmas present. It had a background of red with large white snowflakes. A gold stripe went down the middle of the sweater and the bow was in the middle of Alana’s chest. A note saying, ‘you’re welcome’ was attached to the bow. 

(Zoe’s sweater http://aperweb.com/astonishing-mens-ugly-christmas-sweater/alex-stevens-mens-she-doesnt-even-go-here-ugly-christmas-sweater-2/)  
(Alana’s sweater https://www.halloweencostumes.com/christmas-present-ugly-christmas-sweater.html)

They all looked at her sweetly in the tense moment of deliberation. However, once Zoe and Alana were announced to be winners, Connor’s eyes became indignant and Zoe and Alana became the picture of pure joy. 

“Sorry, Con, I really thought we had it,” Evan apologized, oblivious to Zoe and Alana sharing a celebratory kiss.

“Don’t be. It’s their fault for being so perfect,” Connor accused, his tone half joking, half serious. He pointed his glass reproachfully at Zoe.

“Aw, does it hurt being the loser?” Zoe asked, unable to contain the glee in her voice. Alana nearly choked on her drink. The joy faded slowly from Zoe’s eyes when she Connor nervously bite his lip and glance at Evan surreptitiously. “Seriously, you were good competition. The best we could have. Ever. You and Evan are a great couple. Will I be seeing you and Evan nest year for round two?”

“I can drink to that,” Connor relented, holding his glass up. Everyone with glasses clinked and took a sip of their drinks. Evan and Alana shared a bemused look at how competitive their partners were. Zoe and Connor nodded at each other, sharing an understanding look. Zoe and Alana wandered off, flushed both from victory and hormones.

Evan took Connor’s hand and led him to couch. Connor sat down heavily, only relaxing once Evan started massaging his shoulders.

“You do realize it was just a competition, right?”

“I thought you were serious about it too,” Connor said, not looking up from his drink. Evan nudged Connor’s combat boots with his shoes, prompting him to look up from his drink.

“Yeah, but I’m more serious about you. You don’t ever have to doubt that.” Evan leaned on Connor’s shoulder. Connor hesitantly took Evan free hand, tracing patterns onto it. 

“I’m serious about you too,” Connor said, smiling brighter than he had all year. Evan sighed contentedly onto his shoulder and Connor let himself just be in the moment. As he absentmindedly traced patterns on Evan’s hand, he reflected on how lucky he was for the everything to happened that brought him to this moment. 

Call it holiday magic, but Connor found his life to be perfect as it was right now.

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't related, but Alana Beck would make a fantastic stage manager. Also, there is a recording of Will Roland talking about cats with Mike Faist singing the national anthem in the background (https://www.broadwayworld.com/article/The-Broadwaysted-Podcast-Gets-Silly-at-Sardis-with-DEAR-EVAN-HANSENs-Mike-Faist-Will-Roland-20170510 starting at 44:30) that inspired Connor and Jared's little thing at the beginning that I recommend listening to.


End file.
